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#joke

75 posts54 participants1 post today
Ashwin Dixit<p>Interviewer: "It says here that you're highly adaptable. Can you please tell me about that?"</p><p>Me: [ ...dips a corn chip in bean dip and starts munching... ] <br>"Sorry. Typo. That should be an 'o'. I'm available for adoption."</p><p>Interviewer: ...</p><p>Me: [...continues munching...]</p><p>Interviewer: ...</p><p>Me: "Daddy?"</p><p><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/Humor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Humor</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/Joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Joke</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/Interview" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Interview</span></a></p>
Vladimir Savić<p>🤓</p><p><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/math" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>math</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
weirdjokes<p>Exercise makes you look better naked.<br>So does tequila.<br>Your choice.<br><a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/dadjoke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>dadjoke</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/pun" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>pun</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/meme" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>meme</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/comedy" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>comedy</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/laugh" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>laugh</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/smile" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>smile</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/sarcasm" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>sarcasm</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/irony" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>irony</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/humor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humor</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/funny" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>funny</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/lol" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>lol</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/rofl" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>rofl</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/hilarious" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>hilarious</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/prank" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>prank</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.world/tags/jokeoftheday" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>jokeoftheday</span></a><br>👍<br>Hot Jokes<br><a href="https://weird-jokes.com/" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no" target="_blank"><span class="invisible">https://</span><span class="">weird-jokes.com/</span><span class="invisible"></span></a></p>
Peter Hanecak<p>Deport Donold where he belongs… or at least where he does much less damage:</p><p>via <span class="h-card" translate="no"><a href="https://mstdn.mx/@anae" class="u-url mention" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@<span>anae</span></a></span></p><p><a href="https://mstdn.mx/@anae/114297120346091247" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no" target="_blank"><span class="invisible">https://</span><span class="ellipsis">mstdn.mx/@anae/114297120346091</span><span class="invisible">247</span></a></p><p><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/USpol" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>USpol</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Jester<p>As 007 walked by<br>He heard a wee spider say, 'Hi.'<br> But shaken, he shot<br> It right there on the spot<br>As it tried to explain, 'I'm a spi</p><p> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/jokes" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>jokes</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/limerick" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>limerick</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/funny" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>funny</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/poem" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>poem</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/humour" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humour</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Deborah Edwards-Oñoro<p>I took a rocket science course last year. </p><p>It was a blast.</p><p><a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Jester<p>There Was A Young Lady From Butte<br>Obsessed With A Man Of Repute<br>She Spent Many An Hour<br>Peeking In At His Shower<br>While Tuning The Strings Of Her Lute</p><p> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/jokes" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>jokes</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/limerick" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>limerick</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/funny" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>funny</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/poem" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>poem</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/humour" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humour</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Anthony 🐨🦘🪃🇦🇺🕯🌟🧙‍♂️🇺🇦🇨🇦<p>If you prang a Mercedes Benz, you get a Mercedes Bent. </p><p><a href="https://aus.social/tags/Joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Joke</span></a></p>
Metin Seven 🎨<p><a href="https://graphics.social/tags/3D" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>3D</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/CG" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>CG</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/CGI" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>CGI</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/graphics" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>graphics</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/blender" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>blender</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/Blender3D" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Blender3D</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/B3D" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>B3D</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/ZBrush" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>ZBrush</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/3DCoat" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>3DCoat</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/houdini" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>houdini</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/art" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>art</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/meme" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>meme</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/cartoon" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>cartoon</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/fun" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>fun</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/funny" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>funny</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/humor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humor</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/humour" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humour</span></a> <a href="https://graphics.social/tags/LOL" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>LOL</span></a></p>
David W. Jones<p>What was Batman's original martial art called? </p><p>Biffbampowiezap.</p><p><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/bad" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>bad</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
David W. Jones<p>Want to learn how to turn sand into dust? </p><p>Go pound sand.</p><p><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/bad" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>bad</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
David W. Jones<p>"Gimme your body. I lost mine somewhere."<br><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/bad" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>bad</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
David W. Jones<p>20 years ago I had a black belt. Now it's a rust belt.<br><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/bad" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>bad</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
David W. Jones<p>Tubi, or not Tubi...That is the question.<br>Whether 'tis nobler to court HBO/MAX,<br>or to endure the ads of Amazon Video...</p><p><a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/bad" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>bad</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/Shakespeare" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Shakespeare</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/video" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>video</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Hyo CheetiBurd<p>Sayings</p><p>Cheeti can be a lil silly Avali sometimes, A gremlin sometimes even! What could he be up to today at the park outing?<br><a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Avali" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Avali</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Furry" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Furry</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Feathers" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Feathers</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Comic" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Comic</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/dadjoke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>dadjoke</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Joke</span></a></p>
Hyo CheetiBurd<p>NotePad</p><p>Cheeti has a lotta thoughts that go through his head... Sometimes he just wants to write them down... But then he just gets to thinking again...</p><p>(Hidden Cheeto Alert!)<br><a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Avali" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Avali</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Furry" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Furry</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Joke</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/Dadjoke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Dadjoke</span></a> <a href="https://cyberfurz.social/tags/thoughts" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>thoughts</span></a></p>
Jester<p>Pick a card from this deck; take a peek.<br>(Shuffle, shuffle ...) Replace it; I'll seek<br> It. (Flip shuffle, flip shuffle,<br> Flip shuffle ... ) Oh stuff! I'll<br>Be back with the answer next week</p><p> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/jokes" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>jokes</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/limerick" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>limerick</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/funny" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>funny</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/poem" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>poem</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/humour" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humour</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Jester<p>There was once a boy named Hutch,<br>Men he liked to touch.<br>He did it with a rabbit,<br>It then became a habbit<br>And now he does it too much</p><p> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/jokes" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>jokes</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/limerick" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>limerick</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/funny" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>funny</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/poem" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>poem</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/humour" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humour</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.social/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Maho Pacheco<p>For legal reasons I am forced to say this is a joke.</p><p> <a href="https://mstdn.mx/tags/humor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humor</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.mx/tags/legal" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>legal</span></a> <a href="https://mstdn.mx/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
Maho Pacheco 🦝🍻<p>For legal reasons I am forced to say this is a joke.</p><p> <a href="https://hachyderm.io/tags/humor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>humor</span></a> <a href="https://hachyderm.io/tags/legal" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>legal</span></a> <a href="https://hachyderm.io/tags/joke" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>joke</span></a></p>
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